I have been reading a lot of posts lately (correction-I have been tearing up at my desk while reading a bunch of posts) about things we, as parents, hope for our children. And, to follow suit, I thought I would share some of my own. Just as a preface, I have not made a mental list (as I almost always do) before sitting down to write this. I have not jotted notes either. Basically, I have not done what I normally do, pretty much one hundred percent of the time, which is-write in my head before on paper/screen-so be prepared for this list to be all over the place. Some for my sweet baby boy and some for my over-the-top six year old precious lady. Most of all, all for both.
Firstly (although this is not a word, it should be), I hope they experience love. Every single day. I hope they know what it is to be loved and they know how to love someone in return. Not just mom and dad (but please oh please let them love us unconditionally too). I hope that their love is smart. And silly. And a mess. I hope that they love more than once. I hope that their fist love spares their heart just long enough to love again, and maybe again and again. Most of all, I hope they understand that there are all kinds of love in this world and that each is unique and special. Sometimes I am bursting with it and other times I have hated the very four letters that encompass such a terribly difficult emotion. I want all of that for them. Both.
Second, I want them to work hard. I want them to understand that iPads and NintendoDS are not the root of the world. That there is more to life than Disney princesses and sticks you carry around a gnaw on. And that, in order to have those things-to earn those things (although you don't have to earn sticks per say), you need to work for them. You need to work hard. And I can only hope they enjoy what they do-enough to where it doesn't affect the great parts of life (well, the hours and days that are left after the 40).
I want them to be intelligent. A pluses and high markings are not what I am referring to-although those ain't half bad ;) I want them to make good choices, which is not to say I don't want them to make mistakes...I know that is inevitable. But intelligence allows for constant learning and constant growing. Which sums it up-I want them to constantly learn and constantly grow. I want them to question (this, I do not fear Addison has missed-she questions just about every single thing that is spoken in her direction). I want them to ponder. I want them to be afraid of the vastness of the universe but I also want them to be ever-curious (like their dad-as I have missed the mark on this one).
I pray that they get so exited about something, or somethings, that they cannot stand the idea of living life without having experienced them. For me, this is not lost. There are so many things I love-that I cherish every day. I am simple. I know this. I get oh-so-very excited when the weather is warm like today (after several days of cold). I can almost feel my six minute quiet commute with the windows down and warm sun beaming on me (before the kids join me). I get excited when it is Wednesday because that means tomorrow is Thursday and that is only one day from Friday. I get excited when I cook something new and it works out-like really works out-like I want more instantly kind of works out. I get absolutely thrilled when I make a list that makes it to the refrigerator and gets even one check mark placed. I am telling you, I am simple. I want that for them. I want them to understand and appreciate all the simple pleasures of life.
I hope they have days where they do nothing and everything all at once. I hope they have memories that are made and never forgotten-ever. I hope that in certain moments they stop and think I will never forget this moment-ever. Like singing into antique furniture dusters with your aunts, at the very top of your lungs, way past bedtime! Like driving across a corn field in an old Oldsmobile for the very first time. Like listening to Red Rag Top when your parents bring home a new Lexus. Like the first hug you share with your husband having no idea at the time that is who he will turn out to be. Like bringing babies into this world. Oh. My. Goodness. bringing babies. Like sneaking around your grandmothers house with cousins looking for treasures. Or strutting down the street singing with cousins. Or making rabbit traps with cousins. Or playing in small parks in Iowa with cousins-talking about life at twelve years old. Or walking down the isle. Having siblings to share memories with-both good and bad, pretty and ugly. (You're welcome for that kids).
I realize by now that each of the things I have listed are things that I love about my life. But I suppose that is what a wish list is. Wishing that all the good things you have in your life are not missed on your children. FAMILY is definitely one that does not get written off (hence all the mention of cousins, siblings, etc). I have come to realize that families really range wildly across the board. Yes, I have really only just come to realize this. When I was younger, I knew not everyone went home to what I went home to. I had friends that raised their parents, friends that didn't have parents around at all, friends with two moms, friends with single parents, friends with parents that suffered from addiction-really I had seen it all. But, it wasn't until my adult life that I gained a real appreciation for the differences rather than thinking I had it better than they did. Some would argue that I did. Shoot-sometimes I would still argue that. But, I have also learned that families come in all shapes and sizes (these are the exact words I share with Addison). Some people simply call their friends their family. Some of us have huge families that share everything (oftentimes too much) and some of us have one or two people in which we list as family. Some people wish they didn't have family (this I cannot fathom and makes me terribly sad). So basically, I want my kids to know that family (whatever shape or size it may come in) is forever. It is thick and thin. It is have your back always. It is sing past bedtime into furniture brushes and share life with. It is every thing.
There are so very many more things I am sure, but as I mentioned, this was not a well plotted planned out list. It was merely a quick response to all these lists I have read recently that touched my heart just a little - or a lot in most cases (my heart is very easily touched). My heartstrings are very easily tuggable, if you will :) Most of all, I want them to have the good stuff from Zach and I. I want to not screw things up too badly. I want them to love me as much as I undeniably cannot-get-enoughaly love them and my parents alike- and I want them to have the things I want them to have. Did I say want too much in this post. I am pretty sure I did.
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